Job dilemma!! . . . youngest daughter - Page 5

LilacTree · ‎03-25-2012

@gabstoomuch wrote:
Why are people so judgemental and condescending? Lilac has been around these boards for a long time.

Chastizing her about "what she posts" and "oo, watch out someone might read it" is exactly why hardly no one posts here anymore.

Lilac did not ask if her post was acceptable for all posters. She is just picking brains for other thoughts to bring up while she has this job discussion with her daughter. I don't see a problem with that?

**steps down off soap box*

It gets old.....

Getting lots of opinions helps people sort out their mind for something like making a big job move (or not).

It's the usual suspects, gabstoomuch. I ignore their "cliche" remarks. Thank you for your support though . . . very much.

Formerly Ford1224
We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Elie Wiesel 1986

SoX · ‎03-15-2010

@gabstoomuch wrote:
Why are people so judgemental and condescending? Lilac has been around these boards for a long time.

Chastizing her about "what she posts" and "oo, watch out someone might read it" is exactly why hardly no one posts here anymore.

Lilac did not ask if her post was acceptable for all posters. She is just picking brains for other thoughts to bring up while she has this job discussion with her daughter. I don't see a problem with that?

**steps down off soap box*

It gets old.....

Getting lots of opinions helps people sort out their mind for something like making a big job move (or not).

If all LT wants is a cheerleading section, then your post would make sense ... otherwise, you are being just as "judgmental and condescending." I just hate it when people tell me what I want to hear instead of being honest.

Oh ... and you know what really gets old? The term "usual suspects," ... applied to those of us who even dare to disagree.

There ... now I'm off MY soapbox ... for now.

fortune · ‎03-14-2010

@LilacTree wrote:
My youngest daughter has been working for a large home health corporation that specializes in physical and occupational therapy. They employ about 200 therapists. She, however, works in a very small department as a graphic arts designer.

Management is awful in this company, the "big boss" being a total disaster in his personal life. He just fired the CEO that he hired only months ago and is taking over the management of his company. He owns it, lock, stock and barrel. He has been firing people left and right, and she was beginning to worry.

A friend of hers who used to be her manager there, but left last year, wants her to work for the company he now works for. It's main office is located in NYC where she has never had the desire to live. But he took her up there yesterday and they offered her a job at $18,000 more than she is now making. She liked them very much and they are willing to let her work at one of their local offices so she doesn't have to commute to NYC but maybe once a month. She said it's a higher class company than the one she's with now. I don't know what their business is at this point, but graphic designers can work in any business.

This morning she was called into the crazy boss's office and was offered a managerial position with a raise. However, their salary rates have always been under par. They are obviously afraid of losing her, she's one of only two left in the graphics department and far superior to her coworker. She does not know how much of a "raise" she will be getting, but my bet is it's nowhere near $18,000 more.

However, she is conflicted. This job is close to home. I suggested she make a list of pros and cons (once she finds out what her present company is planning to pay her) and try to make a decision. It's a risk either way.

I know . . . it's a problem many would like to have. But her future does depend on it. What do you think?

LilacTree, you gave her very good advice! You're a wonderful mom! The one thing I would say is that the only way you can foresee future behavior is by past behavior. Her current boss sounds like a mess in that department!

She knows both her current boss and her former manager. Which one does she trust the most?

I lived in New York (Manhattan) for a year and it was a wonderful experience I would not have wanted to miss!

AuntG · ‎03-09-2010

Not much advice to give other than think it through. If it were me, I'd stay at the current job and enjoy the extra money. The big city job would not appeal to me even if I had to travel there infrequently.

GCR18 · ‎07-03-2013

I think she should do a thorough job researching the NYC company and the benefit package. My sister quit her job to go work with a former co-worker. He offered her a bigger salary, etc. She jumped at it. After six months, she was told her job was eliminated. It was a small company and they grew too fast and didn't have money for salaries. Personally, I wouldn't do it.

hckynut · ‎03-10-2010

@LilacTree

Hi to you and I hope you are healing. I read your thread in the Wellness Forum, but since I am a klutz and running into doors and pointed table ends is common place, not much I could offer you.

You would freak out in horror if you ever saw the lower part of my legs. Scars/scabs/dents in my shin bones, just to name a few. And the top of my head? Pretty much the same.

I was very sorry to read about your collision and hope you are healing? I am quite sure you will now find some type of light source before heading down your hallways?

This topic? For me it would be a no brainier. Even though I used to love confrontations with my superiors, not so in this case.

Money to me is, and has always been secondary to me. Living as happy and as stress free life was and is my priority. If your daughter likes and trusts this friend that offered her the job in NYC? Were it my choice I would choose it in a heartbeat.

Take care and you can tell your daughter my view on this. Either way I think she will figure out what is best for her.

hckynut(john)

Irshgrl31201 · ‎03-18-2010

I would definitely tell your daughter to make a pro con list and I would also have her check out the new company and their reputation with BBB and other places online that review employers.

I think that since she knows how her current boss is so dysfunctional and flaky it is kind of a no brainer though (if the other company checks out). She already knows how much she dislikes it and how stressful it is. If the new company doesn't have a bad rep, I would take it. I would also make sure everything the new company says in in writing.

She is also getting the chance to do some work with them before actually taking the job so that will be a good time to see how she feels about that work environment.

Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.
JFK

Kalli · ‎03-11-2010

My son went through a job change a while back and he had to make the difficult decisions, too. He didn't have to relocate, but had to leave some folks he loved working with for a career opportunity that is advancing his knowledge and that included quite a raise in income. But it's hard to know if you're going to have some regrets.

So far, it's working great for him. My only advice was that if the job didn't turn out to be everything he'd hoped for, it would give him more experience and he could always start searching again. (His career is in demand so at least he didn't have to worry about getting stuck in a job he didn't like.)

I wish your daughter luck in her decision. Sometimes jobs are stepping stones to newer opportunities in the future and when they're young, while it may seem like the new job will be a forever thing, it's more likely it won't be the last time they change jobs.

Trinity11 · ‎11-16-2014

@SoX wrote:

@gabstoomuch wrote:
Why are people so judgemental and condescending? Lilac has been around these boards for a long time.

Chastizing her about "what she posts" and "oo, watch out someone might read it" is exactly why hardly no one posts here anymore.

Lilac did not ask if her post was acceptable for all posters. She is just picking brains for other thoughts to bring up while she has this job discussion with her daughter. I don't see a problem with that?

**steps down off soap box*

It gets old.....

Getting lots of opinions helps people sort out their mind for something like making a big job move (or not).

If all LT wants is a cheerleading section, then your post would make sense ... otherwise, you are being just as "judgmental and condescending." I just hate it when people tell me what I want to hear instead of being honest.

Oh ... and you know what really gets old? The term "usual suspects," ... applied to those of us who even dare to disagree.

There ... now I'm off MY soapbox ... for now.

If I had confided in my mom about a very personal situation regarding a new job and she posted where I lived and where I was thinking of working I would be livid. Does the daughter realize intimate details of her work history are being posted here?

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

If it's that crazy and the other job is workable for her, I think she should leave. She should make sure she'll be able to stay at the more convenient location with the new company before she takes the job if that's important to her.