Re: Does it bother you if someone dislikes you

Trinity11 · ‎11-16-2014

Ford....quickly check your post above...you shared some information that you may wish to delete regarding the cause of the problem. Message 110.

asoutherngirl · ‎03-07-2016

IG. I'm not sure if this is the place to continue a conversation of this kind. I am sorry that you have been so estanged from your mother that you do not know her whereabouts, so to speak. You are to me an exceptional person, more so for what you have endured, and what you became despite your upbringing. More could be said, but i just don't know if this is the place.

The thing that gives life its greatest significance is the capacity to care

goldensrbest · ‎03-10-2010

@LilacTree wrote:
@goldensrbest wrote:
@LilacTree wrote:
. . . and you don't even know why?

Do you try to win the person over, or just dismiss it?
I think i remember you saying sometime ago,that one of your daughters boyfriends, did not like you.It use to not bother me alot if someone did not like me, but that has changed for me.
Actually it was her husband and they have been divorced now for almost five years. Of my four girls' marriages, theirs was the one I thought least likely to fail. However, he had some setbacks with business and his own family and he became a totally different, extremely nasty person. He emotionally and verbally abused my daughter to the point that she had to go on medication just to get through the day.

He is still stalking her via text messages which she has learned to ignore. She and I live together now and she is very ill. He destroyed her once vibrant personality . . . actually who she was, she is not the same person anymore.

Yes, I can easily say he and I hate each other.

I am sorry,family relationships can be tough.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.

KingstonsMom · ‎03-09-2010

@Brinklii wrote:
Ig and asoutherngirl, Oh, how well I know what you two were talking about when it comes to abuse mothers! I had one too, and no amount of counselling ever helped me overcome the damage she did to me. Fortunately, I have come to the realization that the problem was hers...not mine...and the things she said to me were coming from a person with mental illness who did not understand the cruel, hurtful things she said and did to me.

Unfortunately, I am the child who ended up as her caregiver. She is now 91 years old, has mild dementia, and is still abusive and narcissistic. Fortunately, I have learned to stand up to her. My siblings are of no help, because they live across the U.S. and don't see or understand what I am going through.

Also, children all have different experiences with their parents. My brother and I were the oldest, and we experienced the worst of her mental illness. We were also the most introverted of the children. My two sisters who came after us had a mother who was, by then, under treatment for her mental illness. They were also the rebelliious type of children who would give right back to her what she dished out.

It's always nice to bump into other people who understand what I went through. I wish I could relate to my friends who say that they had loving, nurturing mothers who they could always turn to for advice and support.

@Yardlie

My heart truly goes out to you and others who had the unfortunate type of childhood that we had, we're not alone.

It's a very hard thing for others to understand, unless they've actually been through it.

I wish you peace, love and happiness now!

You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

KingstonsMom · ‎03-09-2010

@asoutherngirl wrote:
IG. I'm not sure if this is the place to continue a conversation of this kind. I am sorry that you have been so estanged from your mother that you do not know her whereabouts, so to speak. You are to me an exceptional person, more so for what you have endured, and what you became despite your upbringing. More could be said, but i just don't know if this is the place.

@asoutherngirl

I don't want to hijack the OP's thread but I'll say this, my therapist once told me that a toxic relationship is still toxic, even if it's family.

You sound like a pretty exceptional person as well, you seem like a very kind person.

I'm glad we both (and all who've had this type of experience) came through it, in spite of it!

Thank you for your kind words & for caring!

You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

LilacTree · ‎03-25-2012

@Trinity11 wrote:
Ford....quickly check your post above...you shared some information that you may wish to delete regarding the cause of the problem. Message 110.

You're right Trinity. I changed it. As I said, I live with it every day so any time something comes up, I'm right back to when that all happened. Thanks again.

Formerly Ford1224
We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Elie Wiesel 1986

BLH · ‎03-10-2010

Nobody likes me until they want something. I always feel used.

RetRN · ‎10-01-2013

@CHATTY, I hope you are able to say "No".

Lillyrose · ‎12-27-2011

It depends on the situation. I can be thin-skinned, but have learned to deal with it better as I have grown older.

I try to look at myself objectively and see if it was something I did or said. In that case, I apologized and tried to start anew.

Sometimes the shoe is on the other foot though, in which I try to have very little to do with that person.

I avoid toxic people; life is too short.

But I try to have a forgiving heart, and can easily forget if there were circumstances.

Vickiv · ‎06-15-2015

If somebody doesn't like me it bothers me. My feelings are hurt. There's nothing I can do to change their mind. It's just the way it is so I just stay out of their way I try to be nice when I see them I would never snub them. We all have our own opinions of people. I tried to be nice to everybody but sometimes you just can't please everybody.