Community Chat

[mistriTsquirrel]

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@Melania wrote:

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@LilacTree wrote:

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@mistriTsquirrel wrote:

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@noodleann wrote:

If a past disappointment still bothers you, it wasn't minor, at least to you. Maybe exploring why it "still bothers you" would help identify the unresolved issues and suggest ways to get over the hurt. Trying to minimize something by trivializing it, when it's obviously nettlesome decades after the fact, obviously isn't working.

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I think there's something to this.

On the other hand, I've spent too much time agonizing over things that probably should have been dismissed!!

I think we all have those moments of sadness looking back at things our practical minds tell us should be "minor."   Thankfully, most of those moments are fleeting.

If they aren't, I think it's a good idea to explore why something still bothers you. 

And--to answer the question--yes, I am still bothered by minor disappointments.  But they are usually fleeting thoughts and feelings that pass.  I'm thinking that's the sort of thing @LilacTree was referring to.

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@mistriTsquirrel

Exactly, Mistri.  I saw an ad on TV and I made the huge mistake of posting my fleeting thought here . . . and for that I have been overly analyzed and criticized by a bunch of amateur  "therapists."  I really did think it was humorous and said so several times.  And it just kept coming anyway!!

Someone even analyzed and defined the actual words I used that made it "not funny."   

This entire thread has been taken out of context (with a few exceptions by some).  Much to-do about nothing!!  No appreciation of the "nuance" of a fleeting thought by an old woman.  Analyze that!

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So now you criticize people for your failed attempt at humor?

If that's humor then I'd love to know what sadness is. Wow.

You are usually looking for sympathy for your lot in life. I get that but I see you do nothing about it. The "counselor" didn't take your side, etc.

Now you are dwelling on men who didn't give you a ring. Or a dress or a bouquet... That was a choice you made. 

It is obvious you are depressed....we'd have to be blind to see that.

Many of us deal with things daily. 

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@Melania

I really didn't see her post as looking for sympathy, nor do I think she typically does that.  Everybody has things they look back on and feel a little sad about.  That's just life.

[LilacTree]

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@chickenbutt wrote:

Ha!  I knew the 'get over it' squad would appear, sooner or later.

I don't think that when these things pop into your head from time to time means that you are holding onto anything.  The brain stores stuff.   Sometimes it comes to the surface.  You deal with it and it gets tucked back into the netherparts.   

I understand.     I have the weirdest little disappointment or 'wish I hadn't done that' things pop into my head now and then.  That doesn't mean that I'm 'holding onto' anything either.  I guess it just means that my brain still works - some.  Stay tuned for a revision of that, since it seems to be working less and less these days.  

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@chickenbutt

"The Squad" . . . very apt description.  I think I will use that one often.  Thanks CB!!

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