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Super Contributor
Posts: 303
Registered: ‎10-22-2015

Family Secrets ?

Why do some people understand a song?

Until high school, I had a BAD BAD stuttering problem

My sister was 4 years older, she "lived" four years  and I have no idea what happened :-(

 

Suzanne Vega - Luka

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZt7J0iaUD0

 

My name is Luka
I live on the second floor
I live upstairs from you
Yes, I think you've seen me before

If you hear something late at night
Some kind of trouble, some kind of fight
Just don't ask me what it was
Just don't ask me what it was
Just don't ask me what it was

I think it's 'cause I'm clumsy
I try not to talk too loud
Maybe it's because I'm crazy
I try not to act too proud

They only hit until you cry
After that you don't ask why
You just don't argue anymore
Just don't argue anymore
Just don't argue anymore

Yes, I think I'm okay
I walked into the door again
If you ask, that's what I'll say
And it's not your business anyway

I guess I'd like to be alone
With nothing broken, nothing thrown
Just don't ask me how I am
Just don't ask me how I am
Just don't ask me how I am

My name is Luka
I live on the second floor
I live upstairs from you
Yes, I think you've seen me before

If you hear something late at night
Some kind of trouble, some kind of fight
Just don't ask me what it was
Just don't ask me what it was
Just don't ask me what it was

And they only hit until you cry
After that, you don't ask why
You just don't argue anymore
Just don't argue anymore
You just don't argue anymore

 

Good luck to all ......Searching :-)

 

"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." MLK
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,920
Registered: ‎01-09-2011

Re: Born that way?

[ Edited ]

I know  that at some point most of us say "OMG I've turned into my Mother/Father!"

 

That strange moment where you discover how very alike you might be! Smiley Happy

"Cats are poetry in motion. Dogs are gibberish in neutral." -Garfield
Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,504
Registered: ‎05-23-2010

@Jacie wrote:

I know is that at some point most of us say "OMG I've turned into my Mother/Father!"

 

That strange moment where you discover how very alike you might be! Smiley Happy


 

 

 

I used to think I was quite a bit like my mother, but as both of us grew older I realized that while we shared traits and tendencies, our approach to life, how we viewed it (and people) and how we navigated it was very different. We were the same personality type but sort of approached it from opposite ends of the spectrum.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,170
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Born that way?

[ Edited ]

Raised four daughters, all different. No idea if they are like me or their dad.  Kids don't come with a manual, a rule book.  As parents we do the best we can.  I am proud of my girls, each in their own way has made a difference for others.  

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,458
Registered: ‎04-26-2013

Great topic, very interesting insights posted, tho I doubt there is a definite answer, I've always said "it's the gene pool" but I do agree that nurturing also plays a part, so a combination that maybe genes react to different aspects of nurturing in some, don't know if that makes sense

 

A story from long ago, my husband had a "room mate" in the hospital that said he just found out he was adopted, so always thought he was that nationality, but lo & behold his personality was definitely the traits of his "real" origin, that seemed evident to those of us subjected to his behavior.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,814
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Just a guess of course, but I think we come to earth with our basic personality, strengths, weaknesses and talents.  Our environment and experiences can strengthen or weaken what we already have, but I believe the seeds of who we are are already within us. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,504
Registered: ‎05-23-2010

@cotton4me wrote:

Just a guess of course, but I think we come to earth with our basic personality, strengths, weaknesses and talents.  Our environment and experiences can strengthen or weaken what we already have, but I believe the seeds of who we are are already within us. 


 

That's basically how I see it. It's the only way I can explain to myself life-long personality traits that first manifest in young childhood and continue on through life.

 

I was told by a psychiatrist several decades ago that it was believed even then that we arrive with our basic personality.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,645
Registered: ‎03-28-2015

@cotton4me wrote:

Just a guess of course, but I think we come to earth with our basic personality, strengths, weaknesses and talents.  Our environment and experiences can strengthen or weaken what we already have, but I believe the seeds of who we are are already within us. 


That's how I see it too....

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,258
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@Moonchilde wrote:

@Allegheny wrote:

Interesting topic.

 

There are three of us raised by the same parents.  

 

I have personality traits mostly the same as my mother, and others characteristics similar to my father.  Where as my brother has just the opposite of me, his personality leans more towards that of my father, but has many distinct aspects identical to my mother.

 

Now my sister, I have no idea who she is.  I see very little of either my mother or father in her personality.

 

 


@Allegheny, I wonder - what determines who we take after? Our gender? The "strength" of the trait? And as you say, there are those who seem like neither parent. And there are those who are a perfect mix of both. Wonder what decides all this, from a scientific POV.


@Moonchilde

@Allegheny

 

When the sperm penetrates the egg, the first stage of meiosis (cell division) occurs.  In this stage, the DNA - information - contained within the sperm and egg join. The genes specific to each sperm and egg will determine most of our traits (other than environmental).

 

In my case, I have many traits from my mother's German (Prussian) genes (I have the inherited "absolute" or perfect pitch, which she did as well, proven in a Stanford U.study and "forward" or A type personality; but, also an inquisitive mind concerning academic and philosophic matters, which came to me from my father.

 

When my daughter was 16 (she takes after my father), my grandmother (father's mother) had one of the last family gatherings at her house before she started to go down hill.  There were my aunt, great aunts, first, second and third cousins.  About half way through this afternoon tea, I took my daughter aside and told her, "Have you noticed how well you fit in with this side of the family and I'm so totally not really a part of this group, except as a grandchild?  She said, "Mom, you're right. I never noticed this."  I prefer lively intelligent/academic discussion.  This discussion was devoid of any umph.  Know what I mean?  BTW, this grandmother was the best person to me and I was fortunate to have had her as sometime to whom I could go for talks and problem solving.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,076
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Since seeing this question,a few days ago,i have been thinking about it, i feel  nature first, i see in myself, my dad,mom, maternal grandma.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.