Community Chat

[MaggieMack]

I operate on the belief system that our souls arrive in the womb with a distinct spirit, already developed from previous experiences, so whether it is 20% or 60% of that personality that is expressed, who knows? I do believe nurture has some play.

I have a sister, we are both introverts, yet I am much more adaptable in a social setting. She hates them, and I know that there is no one in the room that I cannot make comfortable and relate to. She has been impatient since birth, and she arrived early. I am very laid back, I arrived late. Yet we are both warriors and protectors. Both gentle, as was our mother, also an introvert. Our dad was a great extrovert, somewhat overbearing, right about everything, insecure. We are nothing like him.

Then there is my older brother, another introvert, driven to alcohol and lies at an early age, due to unimaginable abuse unknown to my parents. But kind hearted, and very unlike our dad.

I am prone to thinking we choose the environments we are born into for the development of our spirits. We are here to learn, and families provide school unlike no other. Our lives are gifts, they shouldn't be crosses.

[Moonchilde]

Another thing I shared with my mother is something that some argue to be biologic (professionals) and non-professionals claim is a personality disorder ;-(

We are/were both very sensitive to loud noise, bright light and too much commotion/stimulus although we handled it very differently. I never connected the dots that it was traits we both shared until relatively late in life. She would just complain and lay the fault with others, while I wondered what was wrong with *me*. She never, ever saw it in me. Like everyone else, *I* was weird to her, even though I exhibited some of the same issues she did.  I learned more, and understood that it was real and biological, but I also learned it was me and not everyone else, so I grit my teeth and accommodate where possible.

[Moonchilde]

@MaggieMack, my mother and I are/were both introverts, but fairly different in our manifestation. My mother seemrd to have no self-awareness about herself as far as personality or traits compared to others and no interest either.  Her upbringing quashed that. My upbringing *should* have quashed it, but didn't, and I set out to learn what I could about why I am me and the way I tick and why. Even when I discussed some of this later in life with my mother, she chose to remain wilfully unaware. It all applied to others, not her.

[Desertdi]

My entire family was hoity-toity prim and proper.    I was a flower child.    Now, I'm just an old hippie !!!

[catwhisperer]

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@Moonchilde wrote:

Another thing I shared with my mother is something that some argue to be biologic (professionals) and non-professionals claim is a personality disorder ;-(

We are/were both very sensitive to loud noise, bright light and too much commotion/stimulus although we handled it very differently. I never connected the dots that it was traits we both shared until relatively late in life. She would just complain and lay the fault with others, while I wondered what was wrong with *me*. She never, ever saw it in me. Like everyone else, *I* was weird to her, even though I exhibited some of the same issues she did.  I learned more, and understood that it was real and biological, but I also learned it was me and not everyone else, so I grit my teeth and accommodate where possible.

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@Moonchilde...I, as well, do not like noise. Not just loud noise, but noise period. I am about to go off on a kid outside slamming his skateboard.

[MaggieMack]

@Moonchilde, my mom was the opposite, a great learner always ready to explore some facet of what makes us tick. Very willing to change through new information, a spirit willing to grow. I miss her so much! 

I know now she chose to leave early, at 63, because she didn't have a voice. She has let me know that she does now, and we are still connected by Love. I am most fortunate.

[Moonchilde]

I can only guess that my love of learning skipped a generation and came not from either of my parents, neither of whom possessed it, but perhaps from my set of maternal grandparents, from what I know.

[catwhisperer]

Moonchilde and Preds... thank you for your support.

[Citrine1]

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@Desertdi wrote:

My entire family was hoity-toity prim and proper.    I was a flower child.    Now, I'm just an old hippie !!!

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That's ok @Desertdi.  Old hippes are cool as s**t!

[hckynutjohn]

I do not see people being born with a certain personality. My thinking is it is developed by many different things, starting with the environment in their home and their outside experiences, which includes that environment.

My own personality has changed over the many decades? What it was when I was a kid is not what it was as a young adult, which is not what it IS as an older adult. It also is not the same as the 1 parent that raised me.

Could say a lot more, but I will pass?

hckynut(john)