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Valued Contributor
Posts: 772
Registered: ‎04-01-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Sadly its a fact of life and the weekend is way too short, come Monday you are heading back to the hostile environment and all the feelings you had on Friday will be back.  It's a no win situation .  I think Managers should put a stop to it but they don't because they are usually involved. It's hard to ignore and I know of friends who have had to quit and go elsewhere just to get away from it.  It is very hard to just shrug off because its mean,nasty and deliberate.  Sorry you are experiencing this. I hope it gets better for you.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,044
Registered: ‎10-21-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

One time instead of calling a African American a black woman I said colored woman as we were just talking about something silly. Well when my boss got back I was reported as being racist. I was in shock. I am so naive I guess I had never even heard of that being a racist remark. In my situation it was verbal attacks all the time. It was seriously bullying. I believe they were trying to get me fired or for me to quit because they wanted my job. There wasn't much room for advancement and I had been there around 18 years. My supervisor never once put a stop to it. They would of been fired if I had been the boss. They got there wish. I got sick and ended up in the hospital for three months and never returned. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,057
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

[ Edited ]
Oh yes.  Although most of the women I worked with were fine, there was one at my last job who was downright nasty.  She also made it her business to say derogatory things about me to the boss.  She did this to others, but I was the "favorite" for the verbal abuse and backstabbing.  I think because I had a gentle personality.    Management was aware and allowed it, I think because she catered to them, and they liked receiving reports about what the people in the office were doing when they were out.   This went on for years and was a large factor in my leaving.  Do I know why, no.  My theories are a power trip, the desire to be the center of attention, and a bit of jealously. 
Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,044
Registered: ‎10-21-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

What drove me nuts was nice to your face and then nasty behind your back. The few men in the office I got along with so well. I could of easily been happy with all men. It started going really down hill when a good friend I worked with retired. She was my grandmas age. We had a lot in common to talk about. She always listened and never gossiped what you talked about. She even visited me in the hospital.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 787
Registered: ‎09-18-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

@Ccassaday, I always enjoyed working with men, too and most of the time older women. The men were no problem, and I always enjoyed talking to them, listening to what they had to say.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,257
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Always 2 sides to every story. We don't know enough to make a choice about what went on in the OP's day. 

I worked all my life in a female dominated career, and I found, for the most part , my coworkers always supported each other when it was appropriate.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 967
Registered: ‎10-29-2016

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Yes.  Everyday and for years.  I think it's jealousy and insecurity.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,044
Registered: ‎10-21-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

My aunt used to own a hair salon. When she interviewed people she told me the very first thing she told them is gossip and backstabbing is not tolerated and they will be fired. She would not put up with it.

 

The really sad thing is I really liked my job. I felt like I was good at it. I always let my boss know that I wanted to learn new things. So I was always picked to do special projects and stuff. Woman have to understand they have to be forceful so your employer understands you want to improve yourself. That's why I had the job I did. But that doesn't mean bullying other woman.  I don't miss it all. I don't miss the days that I was in tears. I know some of it was because I wasn't feeling well at the time.  But it was just so bad.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 535
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Why are some women so busy and all consumed trying to CONTROL other women they do not agree with? Why are some women so unable to handle another womans opinion? Answer those questions first.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,044
Registered: ‎10-21-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Oh I have to tell this story. When I would go to use the restroom I would wash my hands and couldn't reach the paper towel dispenser. So I would come out and dry my hands at my desk. To me I was not someone to complain about my handicap. I would just go with the flow. I didn't expect any special treatment. The coworker that sat in front of me noticed this. Instead of coming to me and saying maybe they could move the dispenser down she went to the boss and complained. She made it look like I was complaining about not reaching it and wouldn't say anything. So work got freaked and called me in the office. I guess they were afraid I was going to file a complaint for discrimination. This co worker had no right to go behind my back and talk to the supervisor. She easily could of come to me and suggested maybe I could ask them to lower the towel dispenser or maybe sit a roll in the restroom I could reach. Nope she embarassed me instead and went right to our supervisor.

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