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10-09-2015 12:14 AM
I've thought about this, many days. My conclusion: be the who you are.
I get derided sometimes because I use words like derided. Oh well.
10-09-2015 01:42 AM
@VCamp2748 wrote:I come across as aloof & standoffish. I'm not; I just don't open myself up to others right away. They have to earn my trust. I also have a sarcastic sense of humor that others don't always get.
This would be me as well. I'm an introvert. We are generally not gregarious, open and welcoming except to those we know well and feel very comfortable with.
People who are "accused" (how often it's an accusation!) of sarcasm and "meanness" are often very astute observers of their fellows and able to see beneath veneers.
10-09-2015 05:51 AM
@NycVixen wrote:
I say this from a very humble place. I am blessed to take after my mother who is an absolutely stunning woman. All my life, people just notice my appearance and place too much emphasis on it. I'm not perfect and have struggled with acne issues throughout my life but I've learned to manage it. No one believes me when I say that I have to work for my clear skin. I don't take it for granted and never will.
But what people don't really get about me is that I'm actually an intelligent person. It's hard for anyone to believe I have a scholarship from a well known university. They are just shocked.
All they see and focus on are my looks and as a result I'm not taken seriously. Even members of my family and people I know treat me like this. No one outside of school asks me how my studies are going. They just focus on how my hair is and what I'm wearing. It's really discouraging to be honest.
I agree.....I think being 'pretty' can be a real curse......Some men only want to be with you for "eye candy" and some of the really nice guys feel indimiated and don't bother to get to know you.... you really have to PROVE to the world that you are just not a 'pretty face'.......
10-09-2015 06:11 AM
I loved that you posted this!
Quite a lot of what you posted could be said about me!!
I feel people don't really know me -- at all. Except very close friends. I will seldom approach people first. It's not that I don't like people, but I am a more quiet person and more subdued -- until I get to know you and trust you -- and then I can be really silly and kind of goofy and quite talkative!!!
I think the fact that I sit back and observe, often makes people suspicious of me, or think that I am stuck up or stand-offish. When just the opposite is true.
I am not good in party type settings. I prefer one-on-ones.
10-09-2015 06:51 AM
@house_cat wrote:For me, it's my shyness and cautiousness. I'm really good at faking it when I have to, but I'm very shy and prefer to be alone. I was a fearful child, surrounded by fearless people. I don't enjoy most of the things my friends enjoy. I'm sure they wonder about me sometimes. I know my family always has.
____________________
I could have written your post. Thanks for being so open and sharing.
10-09-2015 06:54 AM
For me it's that while I can be the life of the party and very outgoing and funny, I am such a private person and don't socialize much nor do I want to be constantly busy and on the go. I would sooner stay home with my SO and animals.
10-09-2015 07:37 AM
I don't know. I'm pretty much what you see is what you get. I try! That's what I do.
10-09-2015 08:09 AM
10-09-2015 08:40 AM
Well, sometimes I don't "get" me. I have seen changed in my personality over the years. Some good and some not. I was shy and quiet when I was young and people thought I was a snob. As I got older I became more confident on the outside but inside I was still shy.
Today as a senor citizen I fell OK in my body. I just wish the body was feeling younger.
10-09-2015 09:38 AM
People who don't know me take my sense of purpose and seriousness as being unhappy. I am not a person who runs around skipping and giggling when I have work to do. It is difficult when my colleagues act silly, and I am told to "lighten up." I really hate being told that. I don't ask you to change your personality, so don't tell me to change mine.
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