My son has to do jail time - Page 9

hopeandfaith · ‎01-17-2017

A big thank you for all of those who gave me good advise.

Don't know why everyone feels the need to pick apart what happened.

Until you walk in my shoes, please do not judge.

I love my son - why would anyone think if your son makes a mistake, that you would stop caring about him?? Really?

cherry · ‎03-09-2010

I wish you good luck

apple1964 · ‎08-07-2013

I believe he deserves every day he has to serve and I think he should have gotten a stiffer sentence then that. Anyone foolish enough to get into a car drunk should get a jail sentence. I am a victim of a drunk driving accident when I was pregnant with our first child and the man who was involved in our accident only got two years. I believe there should be a longer sentence's for people who drive drunk more then once. And O/P your son is older enough to understand what a stupied, foolish thing he did. I have zero tolerance for him and for you!

homedecor1 · ‎03-09-2010

@CalminHeart

I can so relate to your story-been there & more. We are both retired law enforcement. I always was grateful for the "tough love" I gave my son, the support group, and support others in the programs gave me, etc.

Its easy for a child to lose his way BUT it's more important the child realizes it was their choice (of course as mom's we want to "fix it").

Everyone has a story and we never know it til we walk in their shoes. (It's easy for others to judge the situation)

Im so happy for the outcome of your son & thankful mine grew into a better man, great spouse, good job, dad & more - he has turned both his life experiences & cancer survivor (late 20s) into a positive by mentoring at risk youth in Juvenile court system as a counselor.

(isn't it strange how it comes full circle for our children if they get it!)

cherry · ‎03-09-2010

OP I don't think what he did was a mistake. It was a deliberate choice, there is a big difference. You should remember that ,when you deal with what he has done

There is always hope for everyone. I still wish you well

apple1964 · ‎08-07-2013

@I am still oxox wrote:
Sorry new member 1 post just registered today some one is yanking our collective chain's.

I agree...

Cakers3 · ‎06-17-2015

@151949 wrote:
A friend I used to work with had a son who was in this situation and was given a choice to either enlist in the Army or spend a year in jail. He picked the Army.Enlisted for 2 years. Had to go to Iran but came back a much more mature & responsible man. He was an only child and she had really never allowed him to grow up. They know how to deal with this in the Army.
If this was my son I would be much more concerned with the fact that he is addicted to alcohol & who knows what else than about a year in jail.

@151949This story is hogwash. A prosecutor/judge can impose such a condition but the military is not obligated to accept it-and they won't.

The Army addresses this issue in the Army Recruiting Regulation, Army Regulation 601-210, paragraph 4-8b: "Applicant who, as a condition for any civil conviction or adverse disposition or any other reason through a civil or criminal court, is ordered or subjected to a sentence that implies or imposes enlistment into the Armed Forces of the United States is not eligible for enlistment.."

"" Compassion is a verb."-Thich Nhat Hanh

Cakers3 · ‎06-17-2015

@hopeandfaith wrote:
My son will be sentenced to 11 months in jail, I believe next week. He had a DUI. He is in his late 20's and basically a good kid, but has made mistakes.

I am heartbroken. He has never been in jail before, and I dont' know what to expect. I told him he has to deal with it. There is nothing anyone can do. It is a county jail in Pennsylvania.

Can anyone give me advise on how to cope? I can not eat or sleep, this is taking a huge toll on me.

@hopeandfaith I'm a tad confused-if the sentencing is next week how do you know it will be 11 months in jail???

It could end up being suspended with conditions applied.

If this is not his first DUI, then the sentence seems appropriate, imo.

I would suggest you check into local Al-Anon listings in your area. You don't have to talk at the meetings; just listen.

Whether your son is an "alcoholic" is no one else's call to make; only he can.

All the best to you-whether posters "believe" you or not is on them.

"" Compassion is a verb."-Thich Nhat Hanh

esmerelda · ‎03-10-2010

@Cakers3 wrote:
@151949 wrote:
A friend I used to work with had a son who was in this situation and was given a choice to either enlist in the Army or spend a year in jail. He picked the Army.Enlisted for 2 years. Had to go to Iran but came back a much more mature & responsible man. He was an only child and she had really never allowed him to grow up. They know how to deal with this in the Army.
If this was my son I would be much more concerned with the fact that he is addicted to alcohol & who knows what else than about a year in jail.
@151949This story is hogwash. A prosecutor/judge can impose such a condition but the military is not obligated to accept it-and they won't.

The Army addresses this issue in the Army Recruiting Regulation, Army Regulation 601-210, paragraph 4-8b: "Applicant who, as a condition for any civil conviction or adverse disposition or any other reason through a civil or criminal court, is ordered or subjected to a sentence that implies or imposes enlistment into the Armed Forces of the United States is not eligible for enlistment.."

I don't think that is what she said. She said he was given a CHOICE. He chose to enlist.

*********************
Keepin' it real.

CouponQueen · ‎10-21-2010

Years ago I knew several people who were in trouble for petty crimes and was given the option of enlisting or going to jail..they enlisted.

Maybe that statue is within the last 20-years or maybe it has been there all along but two people I know of for fact were told that and enlisted and were not turned down.

Years ago things went that way - especially in small towns. I know they did in mine..and I am not a liar!

ETA: and as a matter of FACT. One of them is STILL enlisted today as Active Reserves. He has been in since he was 18...so regardless ...the military did in fact accept enlistments as I know a couple and I do not lie..nor do I do I post hogwash..so if it is fact for me. I am sure there are others that know of small towns that did the same.