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No Thank You Card for Wedding Gift

Started 1291947539.353 in Viewpoints | Last reply 1292274273.29 by qvcaddition

This has been bugging me...

My cousin's daughter got married in July and I never received a thank you, written or otherwise, for the gift I gave. My father, brother and I all attended the wedding and gave her and her new husband money. The checks have cleared, yet none of us have received a simple thank you.

Is not thanking people for wedding gifts the norm nowadays? Maybe it's just me, but I would be embarrassed to not thank someone for coming to my wedding and for the gift they gave.

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The_Black_­Cat1291947660.05963 PostsRegistered 7/31/2007Raleigh, NC

I hate to say this, but the bride and groom have a year to get Thank You;s delivered. I'm in the process of getting mine out too, wish they had gone out sooner, but they're going out now. I'm sure you'll receive one soon, at least I hope that you do. :-)

game-on1291947745.493309 PostsRegistered 6/9/2007

grace's.....i think this generation feels "entitled".....my hubby has a son who has children and a wife....none of them even TEXT a simple thanks....i dont get it....i wrote thank you notes for a simple gift that anyone sent me....and now will text someone or send an email if someone has a phone or email...otherwise i send it snail mail....

meezerplee­zer1291947893.661364 PostsRegistered 8/3/2008NC Mountains

Personally, I think that it shows incredible bad manners. If they had time to cash the checks then they should have had time to write a simple thank you note. Just my opinion...

Hildegarde­ Withers1291947942.90722955 PostsRegistered 7/3/2008

I know the feeling. We gave an expensive wedding present to a couple over a month ago & still haven't gotten a thank you.

When we returned from our honeymoon, I got out ALL of our Thank You cards in 3 days. I spent all day for 3 days in a row writing them.


mareandasp­are1291947966.385102 PostsRegistered 3/21/2007

Be patient Graces Mommy- The Black Cat knows her stuff and the bride and groom do have a year to get those thank you's out.... I have given up hope on a thank you from my brother and sister-in-law's wedding gift nineteen years ago and the baby shower I threw for them 15 years ago{#emotions_dlg.sad}{#emotions_dlg.mad}

mare


I miss you at my feet Dalebug!
December 15, 1993-August 15, 2011
~Until we meet again my sweet doxie~

missyw11291947968.9632020 PostsRegistered 3/4/2007

I think Miss Manners rule of a year is too long. I got my out within a month. It's really not that hard. I hand signed and wrote in all of them.

irish mama1291948298.5174492 PostsRegistered 5/10/2007

My son got married in May. They wanted to give wedding picture thank you cards, it took 6 months to get them back from the photographer.

Their Thank you cards just went put last week. Maybe the couple is doing something like this. Katie

PurpleBunny1291948655.0839232 PostsRegistered 2/27/2008The Couch


Back when I got married, all the books said you had a year to write your thank you notes. I did mine within a month of returning from my honeymoon.

Now though, it seems the proper etiquette is more like two months.

(\__/)
(='•'=)
('"')(''")
Calm seas never made a skillful sailor ...



       










circles1291949199.74317031 PostsRegistered 5/11/2005N.J.

I think a year is too long....two or three months, maybe....My nephew married Nov.5th..I received a picture thank you, today...with a very nice message on it.....

DeltaOne1291949338.6972167 PostsRegistered 12/19/2006

I think a year is way too long, also, to send out thank you notes. It sure didn't take them a year to write and address all the invitations, did it?? We sent a neighbor girl a very generous check for her wedding gift, and we finally got the thank you note 6 months later. In the meantime, she spent alot of time visiting with mom & dad, went on another vacation, etc., but sure took her sweet time in writing thank you notes. I think it's rude to wait that long to say thank you for a gift. JMO

The_Black_­Cat1291949600.717963 PostsRegistered 7/31/2007Raleigh, NC

I didnt personalize each one of my wedding invitations, but I personalize each and every Thank You I have ever written. Sometimes, it takes a little time to write something special and meaningful from the heart. I hope that is why it is taking this individual so long to get her Thank You's out.

Sister Gol­den Hair1291949619.1714257 PostsRegistered 7/18/2008
On 12/9/2010 mareandaspare said:

Be patient Graces Mommy- The Black Cat knows her stuff and the bride and groom do have a year to get those thank you's out.... I have given up hope on a thank you from my brother and sister-in-law's wedding gift nineteen years ago and the baby shower I threw for them 15 years ago{#emotions_dlg.sad}{#emotions_dlg.mad}

mare

I know what you are talking about!!!! Too Cute!!!

Reach for the moon, even if you miss, you will land among the stars.

farmerswife1291949710.887318 PostsRegistered 7/26/2005

I am still waiting for a thank you note for a wedding gift we sent in July 09!!! {#emotions_dlg.thumbdown} I am not kidding!

The_Black_­Cat1291950014.92963 PostsRegistered 7/31/2007Raleigh, NC
On 12/9/2010 lkjhg said:
On 12/9/2010 The_Black_Cat said:

I hate to say this, but the bride and groom have a year to get Thank You;s delivered. I'm in the process of getting mine out too, wish they had gone out sooner, but they're going out now. I'm sure you'll receive one soon, at least I hope that you do. :-)

Who says? That's a ridiculously long period of time to send a thank you note. Guess you're just really lazy, l***r.

Last edited on 12/9/2010

So says Emily Post, I believe. Every ettiquette manual I've seen has always given a year for Thank You cards to be sent post wedding

Jeanhelen571291950233.112711 PostsRegistered 11/1/2005

I was married in 1977--I had photo cards--I never heard of any "rules"--as soon as I got my thank you cards from the photographer, I got my "thank you's" done! I feel that if I had time to spend the $$, use the gift, whatever--I had time to thank the generous giver. I hope I have passed this down to my kids when their big days come! I had 120 guests at my wedding..What gets me---the baby shower where I had to address my own "thank you" card! No good--I had 3 babies--each gift got a personal thank you--addressed by me! It's just nice!

Maggie Nol­ia1291950520.114669 PostsRegistered 1/30/2006

I wouldn't give her a gift for her next wedding.

.

Buzzards fly in packs. Eagles soar alone.

Pray for the USA.


"Let's roll." ~ Todd Beamer, 9/11/01.

AmNiLi1291953716.4032735 PostsRegistered 12/10/2009Born in NY, living in MA

I sent out thank you notes 2 weeks after i got married. If it werent for the honeymoon i would have sent them out sooner. I felt guilty for sending them 2 weeks later i felt like i waited too long. When we sent out wedding invitations no one on my husbands side responded (which that is another topic that ruffles my feather, rude peopel who dont rsvp). The few who did come from my husbands side never gave us a card or anything so they did not get a thank you note. Those that say the rule is atleast 1 yr that just seems crazy, i believe you when you say it but if it takes you that long then why even send one, its just rude, i think, to wait more than 1 month. So the following year i was having a baby shower and when i was sending thank you cards for those gifts i realized the house # in one of the addresses was switched around so when i wrote the thank you card for the baby shower gift i wrote a seperate note saying because i had the wrong address im not sure if you got my wedding thank you so just in case i wanted to thank you again for the wedding gift. I felt horrible that they might have thought i wasnt thankful. They had given us the most money out of everyone at the wedding too which made me feel even more horrible. My dads oldest sister has 7 kids and they have all been married and had 100 children a piece and not one of them ever sent anyone in the family thank you notes for anything. The family doesnt even show up anymore to their events only 1 or 2 people do.

*~Amanda~*
32/F, Married, 2 daughters

Zaksgrrl1291953759.0279844 PostsRegistered 2/2/2008In the sun but willing to go into the dark

The bride gets a year to send her thank you notes.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
When I get through this, I'm going to live the life of an adventurer.
Bear Grylls

kinda korny1291953903.4931186 PostsRegistered 12/10/2007WI

A year....seriously? That is ridiculous!

The truth is everyone is going to hurt you...you just have to decide who is worth the pain.


fashion_fr­eak1291953920.483859 PostsRegistered 9/23/2009
On 12/9/2010 Maggie Nolia said:

I wouldn't give her a gift for her next wedding.

.

now that is just worng lol

Maggie Nol­ia1291955626.80714669 PostsRegistered 1/30/2006

According to Emily Post --

Wedding Thank-You's

When should notes be written?

Contrary to popular myth, the happy couple does not have a year’s grace period. All thank you notes should be written within three months of the receipt of the gift. Ideally, a response should be written on the day you receive a wedding gift. If that’s not possible, set a daily goal. It’s a lot easier to write three or four notes a day than to have to write a hundred notes in a month after the wedding!

.

Last edited on 12/9/2010

Last edited on 12/9/2010

Buzzards fly in packs. Eagles soar alone.

Pray for the USA.


"Let's roll." ~ Todd Beamer, 9/11/01.

WSfan1291956556.1532114 PostsRegistered 10/6/2004
On 12/9/2010 Maggie Nolia said:

According to Emily Post --

Wedding Thank-You's

When should notes be written?

Contrary to popular myth, the happy couple does not have a year’s grace period. All thank you notes should be written within three months of the receipt of the gift. Ideally, a response should be written on the day you receive a wedding gift. If that’s not possible, set a daily goal. It’s a lot easier to write three or four notes a day than to have to write a hundred notes in a month after the wedding!

.

Last edited on 12/9/2010

Yes, this is what I heard also....3 months, for any gift you recieve. My son and DIL were married last year, and I made sure that they were aware of the 'rule'; 3 months, tops. There really is no excuse for not sending out thank you cards when you receive a gift, except for very poor manners.

doxiemom 41291957873.14327472 PostsRegistered 12/30/2008NJ-FL

No it's not the norm.......I really find it sad and very annoying when you give a gift and it's never acknowledged. It only takes a few minutes to say thank you.......

Holly Noel 7/11/97 1/22/11 RIP My Sweet Angel
Annie Oakley 12/7/00 - 8/26/12, Another Angel.








baby burns1291958288.5278793 PostsRegistered 12/9/2007

i get upset if i do not get thanks you cards for gifts, whether its wedding or baby shower,ect. i feel it is ignorant, how can people accept money, beautiful gifts, and not say thank you. it just makes me angry and next time, they will get nothing. my fathers family was from out of town, and as soon as we opened them, right to the dining room table to write a thank you. i feel we were taught right.

ladyroxanne1291962049.0610986 PostsRegistered 3/25/2008northern ca

this has happened to me with a girl that i gave a wedding shower gift and a wedding gift of cash to and received no recognition at all. Unbelievable and i thought she was better brought up than that.

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