What would you do?

MalteseMomma · ‎03-09-2010

I didn't know where to post this but it somewhat involved fashion so I posted here.

Ok, while in front of my home with my little dog this morning a small shivering woman called out to me from across the street saying, "Can you help me?"

I thought she needed directions so I said , "what is it?"

She asked me if I had any coats to give to the poor. Taken back a bit by her request I replied that I did not have any because I recently donated them ,(which was true) but I knew I still had more coats than I can ever wear.I don't know if we should ignore these people or what.

She kept asking me and shivering ,dressed in a sort of poor but ok coat herself and I repeated I had nothing but feeling very guilty all the while knowing I have a total room full of clothing I will never wear in my lifetime but also not knowing if this was a ploy or an honest needy woman begging.

She asked for a sweater or something and then she asked me for $5 .I don't keep cash in the house so I said I had no money.But in my mind I pictured her hungry.

So I said," wait a minute" and went inside quickly grabbed 2 brand new ,tags still on them, Linea sweaters that were handy to just grab without thinking or keeping her there much longer.I wanted her to go away.

She was afraid the police would arrest her for stealing and asked me if they would fit in her old summer canvas tote bag and to help her put it in,so I did.Her bag only had a few tissues in it.She kept saying she was afraid of the police.I know I should have told her my family are all police and my son is mayor of the town ,but I didn't.

She thanked me over and over and went on to say she would be having a very bad Christmas because her mother,father and brother were all just killed in a tragic accident.I said I was sorry She said thank you again and told me if she got some perfume ,she would bring it to me.I told her not to because I had more than enough perfume.Which I now think I should not have said.

I know if I had not given her something I would be haunted by it but now I am haunted by fear that she or others (maybe bad people) will come back and rob me or something.It is sad that we have to be afraid to be kind in this day and age.

Just the other day,i had a young man (now I know who he is but didn't then) ring my doorbell and ask for a shovel.I never open my door or even ans my phone but I was expecting a furnace repair man.He explained he once worked for my son and was doing a job around the corner ,when his shovel broke. Knowing my grandson would throw a fit if I gave away the shovel,i told him my grandson had it.Then I felt so guilty for refusing to lend him a shovel. I later found out the story was true and my son had sent him to shovel a neighbors walk around the corner.

So that is why I easily weakened with this woman. What would you have done? ...and should I be afraid she or more will come back and maybe break in my home for more?I am an old lady living alone.

YorkieonmyPillow · ‎01-13-2013

I don't open the door to strangers.

The little old lady - I would've given her a used coat or sweater(s), whatever she needed to be warm. 5 bucks, yeah I probably would've.`

lolakimono · ‎03-29-2012

Do you think she was homeless and was canvassing the neighborhood?

MalteseMomma · ‎03-09-2010

She wasn't a little old lady ,she was a petite young woman maybe in her 20's .She did look sort of homeless .

My son said many times someone engages you in conversation while another robs you and I should have walked away.

jackthebear · ‎03-11-2010

I don't open the door to people I don't know (I look first)

I would call the police department in your town and report this sounds like people trying to beg or canvas neighborhoods.

Sounds suspicious to me

Southernfriedchick · ‎03-14-2010

I don't go to the door, period. Peeps who know me know to call and let me know they are coming. I don't like drop-ins.

BellaPaprika · ‎03-09-2010

She was young and looked "sort of homeless" ${#emotions_dlg.confused1}$ and she was wearing an "ok coat" already? No, I would not have given her anything except directions to the nearest shelter and food kitchen. She could have benefited from a good meal I'm sure. Linea sweaters not so much. Yes, this could well be a ploy to see if you're a soft touch and if you have nice things. The truly needy know there are charities that will give them plenty to wear and you can donate all your extra clothing to those. I would be very alert for the next few weeks as you may have targeted yourself.

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

I agree with those who say don't open the door for anyone you don't know. People are robbed and even killed from doing that.

I wouldn't have given her anything. Instead, I'd have taken a good look at her, noted the color of her clothing, and gone in and called the police. I'd have watched for the direction in which she was heading in order to provide any information if they needed it. If she's in trouble, they could help her better than you could by just giving her a coat. They could hook her up with a shelter and a social worker who would get her out of the cold and find out what else she needs. If she's a scammer, they'd probably know that, too.

I wouldn't ask her to stay and wait for you to get her something and then call the cops because she could be part of a group of thieves/scammers who might go after you if they suspected you of calling the cops. You can't be too careful these days.

ECBG · ‎01-08-2011

On 12/14/2014 BlueCollarBabe said:
She was young and looked "sort of homeless" ${#emotions_dlg.confused1}$ and she was wearing an "ok coat" already? No, I would not have given her anything except directions to the nearest shelter and food kitchen. She could have benefited from a good meal I'm sure. Linea sweaters not so much. Yes, this could well be a ploy to see if you're a soft touch and if you have nice things. The truly needy know there are charities that will give them plenty to wear and you can donate all your extra clothing to those. I would be very alert for the next few weeks as you may have targeted yourself.

ITA. Every city has wonderful resources. They also have very resourceful highly organized rings.

Mustang Shar · ‎03-24-2010

Perhaps we should all Google where shelters are...I'd never thought about someone approaching me like that. I feel bad for this girl, I probably would have done something for her too.