O/T ? for Sit Down Birthday Dinner at Restaurant

Starpolisher · ‎03-10-2010

My siblings and I are giving my mom a surprise birthday dinner on Sunday. Mom will be 85 on Oct 8th but always said she did not want a party. This year we decided to invite her closest and oldest friends to dinner at a very nice restaurant for dinner. There will be 40 people total. There will be 5 tables of 8 people each. Except for a very short welcome speech at the beginning and later a champagne toast there is no entertainment. It is a 3 course sit down meal (salad, entrée, dessert -which is birthday cake)with appetizers.

I'm was thinking that it's hard for guest to visit with one another, except for the people at their own tables with a sit down dinner. It's to late to change this but do you think it might be better to seat 9 at each table, reserve one seat at each, and have mom sit at table 1 for salad , move to table 2 for entrée and dessert with table 3.(providing this is okay with her and can't ask until we get there) That way she would move and be able to visit with all the guests. The other two tables would be family and since they see mom all the time they'd make the sacrifice of not having her sit with them.

Does this sound feasible? Or should she sit with family and let guest visit from table to table if and how they can? Any suggestions would be appreciated?

"Kindness is like snow ~It beautifies everything it covers"
-Kahlil Gibran

F1wild · ‎11-30-2011

It's so nice for you to throw this birthday dinner! Though, musical chairs with an 85 year old sounds a bit crazy. I'm thinking of having to move her, her things, drinks, etc. I don't mean to sound callous, but I would hate to do that. Is this a surprise or does she know? If not a surprise then ask who she would like at her table.

Is there enough room to have appetizers or maybe just cocktails before sitting down? That would give your Mom a chance to say hello.

Another idea would be to assign someone (maybe a family member) to be a videographer, allowing each guest to maybe say when they met your Mom and a brief happy birthday. That way she won't miss anyone if it's too busy at the dinner. A nice memory.

chi5925 · ‎03-09-2010

I think having your mom move from table-to-table for different courses is a FABULOUS idea!!

This will certainly give her a chance to enjoy all who come to the dinner.

Colonel Meow · ‎05-25-2014

On 10/1/2014 F1wild said:
It's so nice for you to throw this birthday dinner! Though, musical chairs with an 85 year old sounds a bit crazy. I'm thinking of having to move her, her things, drinks, etc. I don't mean to sound callous, but I would hate to do that. Is this a surprise or does she know? If not a surprise then ask who she would like at her table.

Is there enough room to have appetizers or maybe just cocktails before sitting down? That would give your Mom a chance to say hello.

Another idea would be to assign someone (maybe a family member) to be a videographer, allowing each guest to maybe say when they met your Mom and a brief happy birthday. That way she won't miss anyone if it's too busy at the dinner. A nice memory.

I agree with F1wild's thoughts on "playing musical chairs with an 85 year old" - it would probably be more of a hassle on her part. Does she have mobility issues at all?

I will second the suggestion about having cocktails prior to sitting down. That way, she has the opportunity to "work the room", or (more likely) have her guests come to her.

It sounds like you are putting a lot of thought into making this dinner a success, so I wish you all the luck in pulling off a magical evening! ${#emotions_dlg.biggrin}$

Wackers3 · ‎03-26-2010

I think that's a great idea too if your Mom is open to it. I know my Mother would have had no problem changing tables as she was still in great shape and it sounds as if you know it would not be a problem for your Mom as well. Not all 85 year olds are limited in mobility. My neighbor is 93 and still drives to the grocery store 3 times a week - she does have RA now, in the last 2 years, but still gets around remarkably well. When I first met her she was turning 90 and I would have bet a lot of money at that time that she was in her early 70's, at the very most.

Here's wishing you all a wonderful 85th celebration for your Mom!

VanSleepy · ‎10-05-2010

If this is in a private room at a restaurant, people will have opportunity to walk around and mingle. You won't start eating the moment you arrive. Even if your mother did move to different tables, that still leaves 2 tables she doesn't get to visit. --- Sorry, I just reread and saw about the other 2 tables

Wackers3 · ‎03-26-2010

Some in your Mom's age range might have more mobility issues that your Mom doesn't have so it really can make more sense, if you know your Mom can handle it, to let her do the roving around.

It's really a clever idea all the way around. It's a shame you can't somehow figure out how to do tables of 10 as then there would just be 4 but not sure how a seat could be held free for your Mom with a 10 top.

OCGurl · ‎03-10-2010

Great idea, love it!

Desertdi · ‎03-13-2010

A surprise party......and then you tell her she has to ""work the room""...........????? My ma would have killed me.

♥Surface of the Sun♥

KarenQVC · ‎05-13-2010

Hey, just a bit of input. Most of her "old" friends probably have hearing issues. Keep the room quiet and the people close to each other or there will be a lot of shouting.