Would like some feedback on this

beach ladydrb · ‎03-14-2010

On Sunday my youngest daughter was married.it was a beautiful wedding very small and intimate only 45 people. I invited my oldest and I thought best friend of more than 20 years to attend with her two daughters. Before the dinner was served I noticed that the three of them had left. I waited to hear from her and did not so finally today I called her to ask why she had left the reception so early and so abruptly. Her response was that she was offended because I had placed her at a table with all 20 somethings. Those twentysomethings included her own two daughters and since she gets along well with everyone and my daughter and her husband assumed she would want to be with her daughters,she was put at the table because they thought that would be enjoyable for them to be there. Since there were so few people attending the wedding there really were not that many options as far as seating was concerned. I am still very hurt by this even though she says that we should put it behind us. But I'm not sure that I can do that. I could never leave a friends daughter's wedding so abruptly like that for such a reason. It makes me feel as if she does not value our friendship. Honestly at this point I'm not even sure that we still have a friendship because I don't think I can really get over this. I have attended many events where I was not happy with the seating including weddings and never even once considered leaving for that reason. I would like some feedback about this situation.

Still Raining · ‎03-30-2014

It seems rude to me. I have been sat at tables that perhaps were not what I would choose, but it was my responsibility to be polite about it. Actually you can have some interesting conversations that way.

Hoovermom · ‎03-19-2010

Obviously it was all about her that day and not your DD and the wedding. I am sorry that you were hurt. Maybe you can meet face to face and have a conversation to get it all out. Friends of that length of time are hard to come by these days.

Mom2Dogs · ‎03-09-2010

Yes, I think she was rude...if it were me, since you already spoke to her, I would step back and not contact her, she is she gets in touch with you.

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

Since she did say that both of you should put it behind in the past, maybe you should just forget about it. Could be that she was in a 'mood' of some kind. Also, I'm sure her daughters weren't too thrilled that they had to leave along with her. They missed out on a nice wedding, and nice table conversations with others their own age. I would just 'forget it', and start all over again. If something else goes wrong, though, I'd forget the entire friendship.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

Colonel Meow · ‎05-25-2014

While I agree that your friend was quite rude, I think it would be a bit premature to end a 20 year friendship over this one incident. Our friends are not perfect, sometimes they fail us - but if we love them, we must forgive them at times.

beach ladydrb · ‎03-14-2010

I probably won't give up on the friendship but unfortunately I will never feel the same about her. She never called to explain nor did she apologize. I guess it wasn't about my daughter, it was about her.

qualitygal · ‎10-04-2010

My husband and I went to a wedding once and were seated at a table, where the other guests didn't come. We had a good time anyway. When the bride (an old friend) and her new husband came over to visit with us, we had them all to ourselves. It really didn't phase us, since we were there for the bride and groom. We couldn't help who did not show up. After that we did go. So that's my answer.

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

I have a feeling that the friend was in some sort of 'miff'/'mood'. She didn't do her daughters any favors by making them leave. I'm sure that they had words with one another in their car, driving home. Sometimes people awaken in a bad mood, and then one thing goes wrong, then another, and then they end up letting loose all of their frustrations later on in the day, usually onto someone they know they can get away (with).

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

Another new name Sue · ‎03-11-2010

On 10/15/2014 Colonel Meow said:
While I agree that your friend was quite rude, I think it would be a bit premature to end a 20 year friendship over this one incident. Our friends are not perfect, sometimes they fail us - but if we love them, we must forgive them at times.

I agree with this.